Dinner Plans

[NOTE: published last spring in the old blog]

It seems so simple: make dinner. But for me, nothing is ever, ever easy.

I’m lying on the couch, trying to talk myself into waking up. It’s 6:30 and I have to get up now or I won’t be sufficiently sleepy for bed tonight, plus my stomach has been growling since before my nap so I can no longer put off eating. I finally force myself up with the image of grilled salmon and rice.

I open my freezer to find that the salmon is older then I realized and quite possibly won’t taste good. Also, I don’t have a back up to-be-grilled entrée (when I’m lighting up the grill, I like to have a back up dinner to justify the use of the grill—just in case). The salmon tells me it was best by January. Oh well, this is only March. It should taste fine.

Since I never plan my meals ahead, I have learned that defrosting isn’t necessary. I have come to believe that defrosting is a myth created by The Man to hold me back. However, when it comes to fish, I question my conspiracy theory. To assuage my fish fears, I decide to put the salmon on a plate next to the burner boiling my rice; a compromise between defrosting and non-defrosting.
Before going outside to light the grill, I put on a pair of flip flops to protect my feet on the patio. But as I open the door, it grates across my toe. I yell "fuck," trying simultaneously to not drop my herb butter mixture and grab my foot with my free hand. I note that had I not put on my flip flops, my foot would’ve fit under the door and there wouldn’t be blood dripping from my toe.

I light the grill without incident—always good when dealing with gas and fire—then head back inside to grab my pseudo-defrosted, semi-fresh salmon. I’m trying to juggle the plate, grilling tools, a drink, and my phone so I decide to balance the plate on my arm—forgetting that it spent the last 10 minutes next to a hot burner!! I yell "fuck" again and almost drop everything, but manage not to drag the door across my foot this time.

Twenty-five minutes later (apparently frozen salmon takes longer to cook), I’m back on the couch eating slightly unfresh salmon, perfectly seasoned rice, and a delicious salad (achieved without incident), being entertained by the last episode of "The Office" to hold me over until April 10th. Yummy mission accomplished—with only a little blood and one minor burn…that’s what she said…